No matter the person’s age, or the circumstances. No matter the relationships left behind, every death is a train wreck! We received this warning outside of an Intensive Care Unit. It was jarring but emotionally true.
Every human life is so uniquely irreplaceable that each death can cause both an array of emotions and the shattering of beliefs about an afterlife. But each passing is also an opportunity for growth and for evangelizing. Here are some pointers.
- Know your own understanding of death. Do you really espouse the Apostle’s Creed statement, “I believe in the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting!” Have you ever gently shared these words with someone who is grieving?
- Grappling with death includes an extended process of questioning, so ask and listen,” What are your hopes for her or him, now that this has happened?” An end to suffering? A reunion with deceased family? Meeting Jesus, face to face? Or even: “There is no hope, only regrets and loss!”
- Be aware and non-judgmental about a wide array of beliefs. Some believe there is no afterlife. Some think that only the person’s spirit survives: through reincarnation, or channeling, or a kind of limbo. Still others believe that both body and soul are resurrected into heaven or hell (as a reward or punishment).
- Since the exploration of our vast universe, many are baffled by Biblical images like: a heavenly choir of singing angels, the New Jerusalem, the “Father’s House,” or even Jesus ascending into heaven. If so, ask, “Where and what is heaven for you?” And remember. It is a gift to believe that the gracious love of God can both fill and defy all time and space.
- Finally, it is hope in the face of death that is the most powerful invitation to faith. St. Edith Stein experienced this unspoken invitation when she encountered a friend’s widow. Many others discover this when a believing loved one dies in peace. Before Lois became unconscious, she shared a glorious vision of a taller-than-life Jesus in shimmering robes. As she looked closer, she saw deceased but rejoicing family members entwined in these robes –her dad, her cousin, her grandmother. “All of my fears melted!” she explained with a smile. And we realized that Lois’ impending train wreck, called death, was now simply a matter of switching tracks. Alleluia!